This is what it looks like to sleep in Kailua:
This is different from the city. And it’s made me realize that I like sleeping with street noise and in a bedroom half lit by streetlights. I really don’t like the dark quiet. It’s kind of weird. It’s what I imagine being dead is like. I spend most of the night (after K has fallen asleep) reading the news on my phone in the dark and noticing every random noise. I wonder if that’ll change after being here a few months.
I got an email yesterday from a poet inviting me to be on a Bamboo Ridge panel addressing Filipino diasporic literature. I get really nervous about these kinds of things but I’m trying to think of this period living in Hawaii as an experiment. I’m trying to push myself to re-imagine my identity, my path. So to panels: Yes! I’ll do it!